{"id":90605,"date":"2026-04-23T04:06:57","date_gmt":"2026-04-23T04:06:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/2026\/04\/23\/coworker-threatened-me-and-hr-is-doing-nothing-telling-someone-they-need-editing-and-much-more\/"},"modified":"2026-04-23T04:07:42","modified_gmt":"2026-04-23T04:07:42","slug":"coworker-threatened-me-and-hr-is-doing-nothing-telling-someone-they-need-editing-and-much-more","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/2026\/04\/23\/coworker-threatened-me-and-hr-is-doing-nothing-telling-someone-they-need-editing-and-much-more\/","title":{"rendered":"Coworker threatened me and HR is doing nothing, telling someone they need editing, and much more"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>\n<\/p>\n<div>\n<p>These are five answers to five questions. Here it is\u2026<\/p>\n<p><strong>1. Coworker threatened me and HR is doing nothing<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>Last time, a co-worker made inappropriate comments towards me (called me a &#8220;ho&#8221; suddenly) and also made a statement about using a gun on me. She made these comments in front of several co-workers, who reported the incident. Around the same time, it was announced that he was getting a promotion, further adding to the confusion.<\/p>\n<p>The next week, we were told this employee was no longer with the team. About a month ago, we learned that she was actually on leave and has now been reassigned to a different team within the organization.<\/p>\n<p>Although I have not had direct contact with him since the incident, given the nature of what was said, I feel uncomfortable knowing that he is still employed here. Leadership and HR haven&#8217;t talked much about the situation, and I&#8217;m unsure what the protections or limits are.<\/p>\n<p>I have asked HR for assistance in avoiding the conversation, but they have not been helpful. My manager is also frustrated with HR and has offered to help me create my own safety plan, which I appreciate, but I&#8217;m not sure what it should realistically include or whether that responsibility should fall on us.<\/p>\n<p>What is the proper course of action here? Is it appropriate to directly press HR for clarity on security measures or formally request that I have no further interactions with this person? How much responsibility should I or my manager take in creating a &#8220;safety plan&#8221; in such a situation?<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>When things are to the point that you need a safety plan, the person really shouldn&#8217;t still be working there &#8211; not unless there are circumstances that mitigate what happened (for example, a medical problem that has been treated, along with compelling reason to believe that whatever created the original threat will not be repeated and there will be serious remorse).<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s perfectly reasonable for you and your manager to press HR directly for clear answers about how you can feel safe at work. Ideally your manager will take the lead in advocating for this&#8230; and an employee should also communicate with HR, company lawyers, and their boss about the company&#8217;s legal and ethical liability when they are threatened. <i>shoot<\/i> Another employee.<\/p>\n<p><strong>2. Can I wear earbuds to drown out diet discussions?<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>Lately, I&#8217;ve been wearing two earbuds with music or podcasts in the background while working in the office. Usually, this is not something I like to do because I think it can look unprofessional. Especially because I&#8217;m 20 &#8211; I think my generation may have a reputation for being constantly on our phones (and to some extent I understand that reputation and it may be true), so that&#8217;s another reason I try to avoid it.<\/p>\n<p>Lately, everyone in the office has been talking about their diet \u2013 their weight, how many calories they consume, the foods they&#8217;re cutting out, etc. As someone recovering from an eating disorder, these things can be difficult for me to hear. For a while, I was actually in a good place where, yes, it was annoying to hear these conversations, but I could try and overcome it. However, lately, the repetition of these conversations has become more affecting and it has become more difficult for me to focus on my work and maintain my recovery. I would love to ask my coworkers not to talk about these things at work, but I&#8217;m not sure it&#8217;s my place to do that, given that this is a &#8220;me&#8221; issue I have to work on. My solution is to wear two earbuds while I work on finishing those conversations. Is this a happy medium compromise, or do you think it will look too unprofessional?<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>This largely depends on the office; In many offices, this will be a non-issue and completely unfixable. In others, it may seem out of sync with the culture but it&#8217;s still okay to do (especially if you explain it helps you focus). To a minority of other people, this will feel out of sync with the culture in a way that may affect how you are perceived there.<\/p>\n<p>So, first: Does anyone else wear earbuds? Do you need to be able to hear people talking to you unexpectedly? If you&#8217;re still unsure, ask your manager about it! It&#8217;s okay to say, &#8220;I&#8217;ve found that some of the conversation at the office is distracting and I realized I concentrate really well with headphones on &#8211; is it OK with you if I keep doing that?&#8221; There&#8217;s a good chance you&#8217;ll hear that it&#8217;s okay. (And if you don&#8217;t, you can potentially treat it as a formal accommodation if you want to explain what&#8217;s going on.)<\/p>\n<p>But you also have the ability to ask people to stop discussing diet, and here&#8217;s advice on how to do that.<\/p>\n<p><strong>3. Is there a polite way to provide editing services?<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>I am a very active member of an online community for a particular hobby and would love to work for this community. I have years of experience as a writer and editor, and I&#8217;ve noticed that the site could probably use one &#8211; they put out a lot of content and a few errors slip through. I also want to add that the owner of this community has interviewed me, so I&#8217;m not a complete stranger.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m struggling with how to politely say to them, &#8220;You need an editor. Would you like to hire me?&#8221; *Is* there a polite way to say this? Any suggestions?<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>This probably wouldn&#8217;t be a very high priority for an online hobby community, which probably has limited resources and may rely mostly or entirely on volunteers. But you can offer! It&#8217;s okay to be upfront about this: Let&#8217;s say you&#8217;re a fan of their work and an active member of the community, work professionally as an editor, you&#8217;ve noticed that their content doesn&#8217;t often have editing errors (you might include something like &#8220;sensibly, because I&#8217;m sure the people creating it have a lot of demands on their time&#8221;), and you&#8217;d love to talk to them about what an editing arrangement might look like if they&#8217;re interested in it. Assuming you&#8217;re not volunteering your services, you&#8217;ll want to make this clear (perhaps by stating your rates in advance or mentioning that you&#8217;re willing to offer a discount on them if you wish).<\/p>\n<p><strong>4. What to say to the employee who was on strike when we last spoke<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>I work for a company that provides vendor services to an industry that has a fair amount of unionized employees. A few months ago, I contacted a client to check-in, but I was awkwardly told that her department was on strike, so she had no idea how things were going. Such news generally does not reach the national level for this industry unless it is very big or there are some unusual circumstances. I have been doing this work for more than half a decade and this was my first time talking to a striking employee. At that time, I just wished him good luck and ended the call.<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s clear from the notes on his account that he&#8217;s back to work now, so I reached out again today. This time I got a voicemail, but if I had got him on the phone, should I have said anything about the strike? Google doesn&#8217;t tell me much about how the strike was resolved, so I know they&#8217;re not happy about it, and it&#8217;s not appropriate for my role to be involved in those discussions. Overall, this seems pretty low risk but I&#8217;m curious to hear your thoughts.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>You do not need to reference the strike. It&#8217;s also okay to say, &#8220;Glad you&#8217;re back&#8221; or &#8220;Glad the strike didn&#8217;t last too long&#8221; (if it didn&#8217;t) or &#8220;I hope the strike was successful&#8221; or otherwise express your support.<\/p>\n<p><strong>5. How to explain my recent layoff?<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p>As a result of some restructuring in the department, I was recently made redundant after only one and a half years&#8217; employment. The leadership made their decision based on changes in strategic priorities and had nothing to do with my performance. How should I go about explaining this redundancy to potential employers when I start applying for new positions? The &#8220;reason for last leaving&#8221; question will definitely come up in applications and interviews and I&#8217;d like to have an answer ready.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p>Being fired from a job is a completely regular and common reason for leaving a job and won&#8217;t need a long explanation! You can simply say, &#8220;There was a reorganization on our team that significantly changed our priorities and as a part of that my position was eliminated.&#8221; If multiple positions were cut, you could say, &#8220;A reorganization eliminated several positions on my team, and I was laid off as part of that.&#8221;<\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>These are five answers to five questions. Here it is\u2026 1. Coworker threatened me and HR is doing nothing Last time, a co-worker made inappropriate comments towards me (called me a &#8220;ho&#8221; suddenly) and also made a statement about using a gun on me. She made these comments in front of several co-workers, who reported<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6410,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[59],"tags":[1304,14892,3992,3966],"class_list":{"0":"post-90605","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-daily-bread","8":"tag-coworker","9":"tag-editing","10":"tag-telling","11":"tag-threatened"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/90605","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=90605"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/90605\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":90608,"href":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/90605\/revisions\/90608"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6410"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=90605"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=90605"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/christiancorner.us\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=90605"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}