Talking about periods might not excite you, but it’s important to discuss them. If you’re reading this, you probably have a child or know someone special in your life who already needs or will soon need guidance going through this important stage of life.
Below are the questions I am often asked here Department of Pediatrics and Adolescent GynecologyAs well as some helpful prompts that we use with the patients and families we meet.
Question: When do girls usually get their first menstruation?
A: Girls’ first menstruation usually begins between the ages of 10 and 15. Menstruations usually do not begin until about 1-1/2 to 3 years after breast development begins. So we look at breast development as a guideline for when to expect menstruation to begin. Talk to your child’s doctor if:
- Your child hasn’t started breast development until age 13
- Your child has not started her periods by the age of 15
- It has been more than three years since breast development began, and your baby has not yet had her first menstruation
Q: How long does the first period usually last?
A: The first period may last from 2 to 7 days. It can be light or heavy.
Question: Will it be regular every month after the first menstruation?
A: not necessarily. Irregular menstruation may be normal for the first 1-2 years. If you’re concerned about your child’s periods being irregular, check out our gynecology team’s Menstrual Rule (or the 1-10-20 Rule) below.
Q: Are tampons OK, even from the first period?
A: Yes. Some people find tampons more convenient, especially those who play sports or are very active. If you think your child will be interested in using tampons, prepare ahead of time. Show your child how they work so they know what to expect when it comes time for the real thing.
Menstrual cups and discs can also be used from the first menstruation onwards.
Question: How do I bring up this topic with my child?
A: The truth is that this happens with half the world’s population. The more you bring it up, the more normal it will feel to discuss. Staying relaxed and adding a little humor can go a long way on this topic. Young children are often more open to listening to you. Try to give your child some of this information before they turn 11 or 12, so they get used to hearing about it from you.
Q: Does my child need to visit a gynecologist immediately after the first menstruation?
A: No, as long as their periods come on time and they do not have any of the “1-10-20” problems below, there is no need to see a gynecologist immediately. We support the recommendation to see a gynecologist or pediatrician experienced in gynecological issues between the ages of 13-15, so girls can understand what to expect, learn healthy ways to manage menstruation, and ask any questions they may have. And know that the first visit usually doesn’t include a pelvic exam.
Follow the 1-10-20 Rule
If your child’s period breaks any of the following rules, they may be at risk for anemia (a low blood count causing fatigue, headache, or shortness of breath with activity) or another health concern. Consult your pediatrician or pediatric gynecologist if any of the following conditions occur:
- 1: Your child soaks one pad every hour for several hours. This can lead to a sudden case of anemia and symptoms can develop rapidly.
- 10: Bleeding lasts for 10 days or more. This can gradually lead to anemia.
- 20: There are less than 20 days between the beginning of one period and the beginning of the next. This can gradually lead to anemia but is also frustrating for many teens and tweens.
If your child goes without menstruation for more than two months, this is also a good reason to call the doctor. Although the risk of anemia is low in this case, it may be a sign of other concerns.
use a period tracker
I’m a big proponent of tracking periods. If your child doesn’t keep track of their menstruation, it may be difficult to remember when it started or how long it lasted. Having regular periods is a sign of good overall health. So knowing if this is happening every month and for how long can tell us a lot about your baby’s general health.
Show your child a variety of period trackers and let them choose the one that is easiest for them to keep updated. One option is to mark it on a wall calendar or a paper chart downloaded from online. My favorite way to track periods is with an app. There are many period tracker apps that tell you when your last period was, what cycle day you are on, and the estimated start date of your next period. Some also have symptom trackers that may be helpful. We often recommend the following options to try: Clue Period & Cycle Tracker, Flow My Health & Period Tracker, Spot On Period Tracker, or the Apple Health app.
useful tips
- If your child has not started menstruating yet, Stock up on period products now. Choose a variety of products so that when your child starts out, you have something on hand and don’t have to go out shopping for supplies.
- period underwear is a great product that is getting a lot of attention these days. They look and feel like normal underwear but have a special layer to absorb blood. They come in a wide range of sizes, styles and absorbency. period swimwear is also available and may interest your child. It is highly effective and great for holidays and “surprise periods”.
- Consider Making a Small Bag Stock your child’s backpack or gym bag with pads, tampons, and clean underwear so they’re prepared for any emergencies.
- encourage your child share emergency supplies with a friend.
Periods are a fact of life. Talking about them with your child can help both of you become more comfortable hearing and talking about this type of information. You want your child to feel comfortable, so that if they have a problem, they will come to you about it.
For more information about periods and starting these important conversations, listen to our podcast:
