Hello Beautiful people! How are you? i missed you all so excess. I’ve spent the last six months on mat leave with the newest member of our family, Evelyn. After the birth of my son Emiliano, I wrote down four things that surprised me about the birth of a second child. So, I thought it would be fun to share five things that have surprised me as a new mom. Three…
1. Random milestones are just as beautiful as big milestones. With my first daughter, Ella, I couldn’t do it wait Watching him hit his first few milestones, like rolling over or sitting up on his own. Now, as a mother of three children, I still get excited about those moments. But do you know what is equally surprising? Seeing their startled reaction for the first time – as they wave their little arms like they’re trying to catch air as I gently lower them onto the changing table. I love hearing the sounds they make when they nurse. And once they get used to walking, I cherish the thump of their footsteps as I trot down the aisle. With each baby, I’ve seen new milestones that melt my heart.
My mat-leave uniform: oversized t-shirt, maternity leggings, and a baby on my belly 🙂
2. The desire to feel like I have it has diminished significantly. As a people pleaser, I’ve always struggled with asking for help. With my first child, I did everything on my own. With my second, I started accepting help whenever family and friends offered it. But during my pregnancy with Evelyn, I quickly realized that Max and I would need all the help we could get. So, I actually reached out to my mom with a list of tasks I was struggling to do before I went into labor — including washing our bedroom sheets and cleaning the toilets (!). I felt somewhat nervous asking because the tasks seemed so personal (again, toilets!). But I imagined what it would feel like to arrive to a messy house two days after delivery, with a newborn, toddler, and four-year-old competing for a parent’s attention — and the anxiety I felt was outweighed by the embarrassment of asking. When I returned home from the hospital, my mom and grandmother had checked everything off the list – and it was a joy to come home from the hospital and clean the sheets. You can always count on women to get the job done.
My Aunt Annette, is a true saint who always offers to help my kids!
3. My desire to help other mothers has increased significantly. Last month, I messaged a new friend who has a baby and a five-year-old. She told me she was sick, and without hesitation I offered to drop off the soup for dinner. Now I’m not sharing this to brag, just to say that I felt an urgent need for help because I know how hard it is to be sick with two small children. In my five years as a mom, I’ve been very fortunate to have support from other moms — putting away piles of clean dishes when they stop by, or taking one of my kids to the potty at a restaurant so I can finish dinner. Paying forward these good causes seems like an easy way to honor all the women who have helped me.
4. The more kids you have, the more clearly you realize how you want to spend your time. Having three children under the age of five leaves me with about 30 minutes of personal time a day. I realized I loved being outside working in our vegetable garden, or lying in bed reading funny novels (I was blown away by that). This one). It’s satisfying to know what really brings me energy and joy during this busy season.
5. Seeing the similarities between all your kids is a whole new high.
It’s magical to see your newborn create the same smile on the eyebrows that his two elder siblings did as babies. (Of course, you can experience this with two kids or if your kids have cousins, too.)
Now I would love to know what surprised you after having the first or second or third (or fourth??)? Please share below, I’m all ears! And sending love to those who are wishing or trying for a child. xo
P.S. Three words that changed the way I parent, one thing that made Joanna wonder about parenting, and what’s the best age difference between siblings?
